Ebony Stewart – “Mental health Barz” @WANPOETRY


– I’m an artist, which also means I’m a creator, because I create things. A storyteller since I
have stories to tell, a visionary, I write
about where I’ve been. These poems act as
self-help, I’m a healer. Not always for myself,
but one time a kid told me he almost killed himself, but he heard one of my poems
and decided to keep living. And from that day forward, I was like– (audience applauding) Today is a good day to keep someone alive. People ask me how I did it
or how they should do it, and I’m not sure if they’re asking me about the kid or themselves. What I’ve come to learn is, no one can tell when I’m
not doin’ well but me. I get to travel across the country and do poems for a living,
like, that’s my job. And out of 50 states, I’ve
performed in 47 of them. I read an article that said
only 20% of people in the U.S. are doin’ what they actually love, or whatever sad statistic it
was and I was like, my god ain’t damned nothin’ in
me, I’m doin’ exactly what I’ve always wanted to do. (audience applauding) So I must be blessed. Must be exemplifying all this miracle, I am stressed and winning. I look at and update my
curriculum vitae daily and I’ll be like damn, I’m surprised I even knew how to say that word, and– (audience laughing) Ain’t nobody wishin’
nothing bad on me but me. Like everything I’ve
ever wanted, I manifest. And at the end of each of meditation, I ask the universe to
make me undeniably enough and people be mad happy when I show up. One time, I performed for 200,000 people and I didn’t throw up. It was so cool and exhausting. Did you know, I could
touch what feels like a million people’s energy
and help them feel seen and go back to my hotel
room feeling so fulfilled, yet lonely, yeah, it’s amazing. Another time, I though I
was gonna marry this guy I had been with for like,
six years out of my life, but he said he hated my lifestyle, even though this is my life’s work, because my work means I’m never home. But every time I came back, he was gone, as in emotionally
unavailable, mentally abusive. I have extreme PTSD from
that unhealthy relationship, but someone asked me to do that one poem about that one time where he was mine. May you find a lover that
helps you love yourself. May you find a lover
that doesn’t require you to give more to them than
you have to give to yourself. Did I mention I paid off my
student loans with poetry? Can’t nobody– (audience applauding) Can’t nobody tell me
I’m not the shit but me. (audience exclaiming) I get so sad sometimes, I
think I’m losing my mind, and I must be, since I
enrolled in graduate school this past May. I guess I returned to my oppressor. I am whoever the fuck I think I am, but I wish being a good person paid more. I heard it’s the wounds people can’t see that hurt the most, but I’ve seen sunsets that look like somewhere. Tomorrow, my heart is on
fire, so I’m chasing the day. At night, I don’t sleep, I grind. I been in my prime like, nine times. I got so much love I
give, and keep giving. I have so much advice
that are really opinions, or maybe they’re just hard facts I haven’t hardly learned yet. Did I mention that people comment on how I’m doing
by mentioning my weight? And here I am, some foolish somebody that didn’t actually hate the way they looked today. But you right, girl, must be
the depression. (chuckling) But I’m the kind of
giant that’s been through what I’ve been through, and
you can still depend on. (audience clapping) I gave all that I had. And you ain’t never known a
black woman who ain’t did that. My friends call on me
when they’re down and out, or just in need. And what good is a god that
can’t speak life into somebody? Check on your strong friends,
check on your strong friends, check on your strong friends. (audience applauding) Don’t believe us, I
promise we’re pretending. Have you ever tried to tell
someone you’re not okay, and they’re like, “you’re
good,” and you’re like, “but I’m not,” and they’re like, “you’ve got this,” and
you’re like, “but I don’t,” and they’re like, “keep going,” and you’re like, “okay.” Thank you. You’re right. I could do this with my eyes closed. I’m so overwhelmed that one time, I was drowning and screaming,
but everybody thought I was swimming and smiling. I died in that dream and
then I woke up on an airplane flying to a different
country to do poetry. I’m so blessed, I’m so
blessed, I’m so blessed, and my heart is racing, my mind is crazy. I’m probably dehydrating, traveling does awful things to the body, but
the one thing I can tell you about being successful
is that you have to love what you’re doing. Can’t nobody steal my joy. Can’t nobody steal my
joy, not even myself. (audience clapping) I heard that, or someone said that if your path is more difficult, it’s because your calling is higher. And so I say I be hero and legend. Nobody built like me, I designed myself. But every time I climb,
my community get co-sign. Divinity divine, cheers to the most high. I just pray I leave something good behind. My name is Ebony Stewart,
thank you so much. (audience cheering and applauding)

20 thoughts on “Ebony Stewart – “Mental health Barz” @WANPOETRY

  1. Has to mean something that I stumbled upon this right before I went to sleep…right when I needed it most 😭🙏🏾🙌🏾

  2. “These poems act as self help, I’m a healer, not only for myself, but one time a kid told me he almost killed himself but, he heard one of my poems and decided to keep living, and from that day forward I was like, today is a good day to keep someone alive.”
    That’s real❤️

  3. 'I pray, I leave something good behind'…Humbling, powerful, creative. inspiring, real poem…I love you Ebony..Keep soaring higher

  4. "Did I mention, I paid off my student loans with poetry? Can't nobody tell me I'm not the shit but me." LET ME TELL YOU…IT MAY BE DIFFICULT BUT, WITH A PLAN, IT IS POSSIBLE!

  5. YAAASSS!! I swear I refresh YouTube every other day waiting for new poetry from her! I’m obsessed! One of my favorite spoken word artists. So real, so raw, so relatable! Love herrr!

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